Yesterday, I was walking to my car when I realized that the sky had opened up and good old Jack Frost had begun tossing around snowflakes again. Seeing as how this is the first time since February or so that I have had the chance to see snow falling around me, I got pretty excited, and as embarrassed as I am to admit it, I spent the better part of ten minutes running around in circles trying to catch a stray snowflake on my tongue (I finally did catch one, in case you were wondering). Anyway, I am happy to announce to the world (or at least the handful of readers who still frequent these parts) that I made it snow. Yeah, that's right. Without my intervention, it would not have snowed at all yesterday. I'll explain why in a little bit, but there's something you need to understand first.
I am a Christmas fanatic. I'm the kind of guy who can listen to Christmas music in the middle of June without the slightest hint of humiliation showing on my face in a crowded room. I'm of the same yuletide brand that QVC and department stores hail from - ready in September for what we won't really need until midway through December. While other, more sane shoppers are complaining about the Christmas decorations flooding the shelves with exclamations like "what happened to Halloween and Thanksgiving," and "didn't we just do all this," I'm one of the few Christmaholics skipping down the aisles in zest at the glory of miniature porcelain Christmas villages, and overpriced Hallmark ornaments. Actually, men don't skip, so it's more like competitive walking with a hint of childhood mannerisms exuberating between steps. Regardless, I'm pretty much militant when it comes to all things Christmas. It's the little things that excite me too, and when I first noticed that the marts (K-Mart, Wal*Mart, and Target, for those of you out of the loop of my lingo) were stocking their respective "garden centers" with Christmas supplies, I think I nearly went into convulsions. I don't know what it is, but there's something about giant, 8 feet tall, inflatable snowglobes with giant, 4 feet tall, inflatable Charlie Browns inside that makes me high as a kite.
Anyway, earlier I made a pretty insane statement - that I was responsible for the snow. I'm not backing off from that sentiment either. I really am responsible. You see, over the weekend I put up a Christmas tree. Yes, I am aware that it's only October twenty-something. It's only a little guy (maybe two feet tall), but it's still the first Christmas tree put up this year within a pretty big radius (I don't want to say just how big, because I live pretty close to a mall and they've had several trees up at a number of stores for the last two weeks). Anyway, I've successfully fooled Mother Nature into thinking that it's late November (about the time when my tree usually goes up), and now we're seeing weather around my parts in the negative double digits (more like 40s-50s, but hey, it's my blog and I'll tell you whatever I feel like telling you). This is just the beginning too. Soon, I'll be putting out my annual Christmas village display (one of my favorite things about Christmastime), something that I've been modifying for the last three years straight (come to think of it, it really should be more impressive after three years of work). It's all coming a bit earlier this year, but I'm not worried. Mother Nature will probably figure out that I'm crazy pretty soon and the jig will be up. If I can keep it going for just a little longer though, I'll be content, because by then it'll actually be time for harsh weather anyway. The gap between the two will be foggy at best, and I will have successfully altered the fall/winter seasonal divide! Hurray for me. Hurray for Christmas.
